Starting a blog was a goal I always wanted to accomplish. Did I expect to start this soon? No. When I envisioned myself blogging, I thought it would be when I’ve got all my ducks in a row. I had no plans to write about 5 signs of an unhealthy relationship.
Nonetheless, while working on a project with my mom, I felt inspired to start my blog. Sharing my motherhood experience was my main focus. I also knew I wanted to talk on the topic of relationships.
To be clear, I am no relationship expert. My life is pre-teeee much far from perfect, and my relationship is nowhere close to what I want it to be. Am I the only one? Ummm… I highly doubt it. There’s something about talking about our highs and putting our lows at a distance.
There will be a mixture of both the highs and the lows in this space. When I created this space, I specifically had in mind the people in similar situations like myself.
By now, you probably know relationships aren’t always a bed of roses as much as it may seem from the outside. While I am no relationship expert, experiences can sometimes be our greatest teacher. Maybe you can relate to what I spoke about in this post. Or, maybe you simply cannot.
Here are 5 Signs, of what I consider to be An Unhealthy Relationship.
1. Your values are ignored.
As simple as this one might be. No one wants to feel their values are not relevant to their significant other. We want to feel heard by our significant other.. Something such as not wearing shoes outside, then coming in the house with it, might be what you value.
It is necessary to have shared values in a relationship. When you and your significant other do not have shared/similar values, it makes the relationship difficult. What happens is a constant tug of war between both partners.
2. Continuously arguing around the kids.
Can you imagine yourself being a young child again, and all you see is mom and dad bickering with each other? How does that make you feel? Children learn what they see and hear, and will also mimic those things.
I am a firm believer in, whatever you do in the presence of your kids, let it be a good example to them. We, as parents, are our kids biggest influence. The home is where a child learns the majority of what will shape their lives for the future. Constantly arguing in front of the child, or children, is not healthy for any child as that can be very damaging to their mental health. As adults, Is that how we want to teach our kids to communicate?
3. Failing to come to a mutual understanding.
If coming to a mutual understanding as adults is difficult, what is the point of even being in a relationship? More than likely the problem will keep arising and there will be a constant back and forth with each other.
A relationship like this becomes stagnant with no progression. Instead of focusing on moving forward and building the relationship, the time is spent on dealing with the same issues repeatedly. This can be very tiring and stressful for everyone involved.
4. Unfaithful.
this is probably the biggest of them all. You might disagree. Being unfaithful while in a relationship is very damaging.
Whether it be entertaining persons from previous relationships, or making plans to meet up with the opposite sex. When the trust is broken it makes the relationship difficult to move forward on healthy grounds, especially if nothing is done to regain trust. This is unhealthy because everything the individual does, moving forward, you may question. This makes it hard for you to see a future with someone you cannot trust.
5. You Cannot speak to your significant other about certain things.
In a relationship, everyone would not agree on the same things, because at times, we share different view points. However, regardless of this, being able to openly speak to your significant other about anything is important in a relationship. It gets awkward when you’re at the point where you feel like most things said, might be an offense.
At times we need someone to speak to, one individual might not always understand what the other individual is trying to say, but being a listening ear is enough. It is damaging to a relationship when someone goes out of the relationship to discuss their problems simply because they do not feel comfortable doing so with their significant other.
This brings us to the end of this post. I do hope this post was very informative to you, as much as I intended for it to be. Please note this was written from my point of view. Any point or points, mentioned here, is not to be taken personally, to cause disruptions to your relationship.
