Ok, so this is getting personal. But these are the conversations that are needed. The fact that I’ve just finished reading The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fuck. There is no better time to write this post than now. I’ve been slowly finding my voice, and it feels great because these are the conversations I care to share my thoughts on. Where is a better place to communicate that, other than in this space? Some of you may cringe at this topic, while some of you may embrace it. Hear me out, though.
A little of me.
My thoughts on sexual activity in one word is sacred. I consider it to be sacred. It is from God. It is deep. It is pure. It’s how we find pleasure, and also how we create life.
Every activity we do requires our energy. Sex is the same; it is an activity that requires energy. When you connect with someone else, it’s your energy connecting with theirs. I see it as the most intimate level of connection someone can experience with another person. You do not want to give your energy to anyone and everyone. Especially if they are not in alignment with who you are.
When I met my kids’ father, I made it clear I am not into any relationship based solely on sex. There are other ways to connect intimately with your significant other, without sexual activity being what’s most important, and what’s keeping the relationship. Some months before conceiving our last daughter, we had been separated for some time. Once we got back together, the first interaction we conceived her.
A couple of days after she was conceived, although I had no definite clue. I made it clear I no longer wanted to live like this, and I explained to him, in these words, “It just does not feel right. I feel like I am doing something wrong. And I prefer to abstain from here on out. For as long as God permits.“
My perspective.
I have realized there is more to a committed relationship than sex, and sex can be great when we’re in tune with both our spiritual and physical selves. Choosing to abstain from sex means you’re starving the flesh of its desire. Similar to fasting from food. That way, you can now focus on nourishing the spiritual self. At times, sex is not the answer to a problem, but it’s what some convince themselves they need because it is a natural desire of the human flesh to want what brings it pleasure. Temporary pleasure that is.
But once you can abstain, it is a form of self-discipline; you gain control of yourself and your mind. Our body wants what we tell it it wants, if that makes sense. But once you are not so focused on your wants, you will notice you are living daily, and you are now able to intentionally tap into your higher self by focusing on the part of you that needs development. That is the goal of abstaining. To connect with your higher self.
Once it’s time to connect with your person, I can only imagine it will be a magical experience. Considering you both are in tune with your individual selves and aligned greatly with each other.
I thank you for reading, and I wish you great discipline on your abstinence journey.
